My husband and I agree on most stuff, we have similar hobbies and passions and views on the world however when it comes to decorating our home we couldn’t be more different. How can a man who agrees with me on what sports teams to cheer for and which holidays are most important not share my vision for how our home should look. He likes leather and glass and shiny steel… I like light woods and rich colors and neutral tones. We literally could not be more different in how we decorate. His idea of how our living room should look includes Sports memorabilia and his fantasy football trophy (think man-cave) my idea of how our living room should look is family photos, comfy couches and lots of pillows and throw blankets! We are currently in the process of renovating the main living space in our house (dining room, living room, hallways). You would think the most challenging part would be living with the dust and debris that comes with construction but I can honestly say settling on paint and flooring choices has been more difficult. He wanted shiny cherry wood floors, I wanted super light natural one’s. He likes white for the walls and taupe is more my style. Countless paint samples later he finally looks at me and says honestly I could care less do whatever you want you’re the one who cleans it! Grrrr! We could have saved 2 precious weeks of our time if I had that information earlier! The crazy thing was he wasn’t even snotty or sarcastic he really does think that since I spend the most time there I should get to choose, this is awesome by the way but now I am thinking we’re you just screwin with me… is that one of those “how to annoy your wife things”? I think he purposefully dragged it out just because he can.
So finally after all the nonsense my new gorgeous light natural wood floors go in on Monday!!!! And they will match my taupe walls perfectly. I am like a kid at Christmas I can’t wait, and as I am spending last night removing the last of the furniture and touching up the paint he turns to me with a smile and says…. I changed my mind! I like cherry better!
Chuckling at the thought of kicking his ass,
fresh off my wonderful vacation with the hubby and la familial and ready to get back to work! I had nothing but downtime and relaxation for the past 2 weeks and it gave me plenty of time to think. One of the family topics that was covered was what to do about our upcoming anniversary. As you my readers know we have decided to throw out the idea of a big bash and instead do a low-key bbq and housewarming party ( low-key meaning 75+ guests!!!!). I broke the news to my fam and it was agreed that we were making the best decision for us but that got me thinking bout weddings in general and the question going round my brain is how much is too much? When does a wedding stop becoming a celebration of your new marriage and life together and start becoming a way to one up and impress people you haven’t seen in years. I sit in my office day in and day out and am inundated with nothing but wedding paraphanilia and I gotta tell you sometimes even I think it’s over the top and ridiculous. In 2007 the average cost of a wedding reception was 28,000$ twice the amount spent in 1990 and currently the wedding industry nets 161 billion dollars annually!! 28,000$ for an event that lasts 1 day just a mere 14 hours, to me that’s crazy and this is what I do for a living. People ask me all the time ” don’t you watch the wedding shows on t.v.”? Honestly, NO! I can’t stomach it. I have a hard time watching a girl spend 7,000$ on a dress she will wear for less than 8 hours or 45,000$ on a reception site. 200$ a person favors.. really! people are just going to throw it out! Don’t get me wrong I am not against spending some money to have a great wedding with good food and good drinks with the people you care about, but when you start to get into the 10’s of thousands maybe you should reconsider how better that money could be used like on your home or a tuition fund for you children. No marriage should begin with a massive amount of debt looming over your head. Remember the most important part of that day is the seriousness of the commitment you are making to one another, not the chaircover color being the exact same shade as the bridesmaids dresses.
Keep it in perspective!
Thanks to everyone who weighed in on my blog “HELP” last week. Shawn and I gave it a lot of thought and considered all the good advice and we are going to skip a wedding reception. You my readers were right, I was only doing it because I thought it’s what everyone else wanted but it’s not what I wanted. We decided instead to hold a house-warming bbq on our 1 year anniversary. I think it’s the best way to enjoy our first year together as a married couple. What better to have good food and good company in our new home! We decided to take the money we would have spent on a reception and to have a true honeymoon before we start trying for kids.In the grand scheme of things you would look back on and regret, I feel like that time alone together means more to us than a big reception and I would not want to regret missing that.
Note * to all my reader who are friends and clients, I am NOT knocking big receptions!!!! I just didn’t think it was right for us!!!*
I know I am still fairly new to this blogging thing and I am supposed to be a wedding pro but I have come across a question of my own that i just can’t seem to answer. My husband Shawn and I chose to do a small, quick wedding back in June, we got engaged in the end of March. There were a lot of reasons to why we didn’t want to wait more than a few months to get married and to why we wanted to do a small wedding ( think 20 people small). I will never regret that decision and that day was the best day of my life but we did give up certain things and missed out on a few moments. That being said it’s been expected that we have a reception on our 1 year anniversary so that we can celebrate with the guests that didn’t attend the ceremony and also it allows us the opportunity to get back special moments ( first dance, toasts ect..) that we missed the first time around. When we first discussed doing a small wedding we always intended to hold a large reception a year later, that was the plan! However after over half a year of marriage it is starting to seem unimportant. Things like buying a house and having a baby are more pressing issues and I am having a hard time justifying the money for a reception when I am a year deep in my marriage. The problem is all of our friends and family that weren’t invited to the ceremony already feel slighted and I don’t want to cause anymore hurt feelings then I already have. What to do in a situation like this?
I find myself at a loss and considering I almost always have the answer when it comes to this type of stuff I feel like I am traveling foreign waters.
Comments and suggestions are most appreciated especially if anyone who follows has been in a similiar situation, and to my family and friends please don’t hesitate to be honest.
I am a nutcase for going anywhere near a shopping store, mall ect… these last few days. Talk about a madhouse. I am pretty sure I almost got shot over a parking spot, I lost my pinkie toe in a shopping cart collision and lost the race for the next spot in line to a harassed looking older lady carting 2 crying toddlers and a sleeping infant. There was a moment where I reached for the same size medium sweater as another women and I am positive I saw her fangs come out… I let go of the shirt for fear of losing a few chunks of skin.
I should have started this months ago so I could avoid the absurdity known as Christmas shopping but I procrastinated as always and now I am paying the price ( in blood) for my horrific mistake.
So once again my tip for today…. shop for christmas early and avoid the stores in December.
So here I am 2 weeks from my wedding, no dress and in the throes of a complete meltdown. Where was I going to find a dress that didn’t require weeks of alterations and more importantly how much was this going to cost me? Off to David’s Bridal we went, they were the only place you could buy off the rack and take it with you that night. Walking into their lobby I finally started to get emotional about what exactly we were there to do, I was buying my wedding dress!! MY WEDDING DRESS!!!! where did I even begin? Hours of parading back and forth in front of my dad, mom and sister (via I-phone) finally led me to what I had been looking for all along, how did I know this was my dress? I couldn’t stop crying while I was in it! Dad had tears in his eyes, mom was all choked up and my sister kept chanting “That’s the one, That’s the one”. The dress made me feel gorgeous it fit well, hid the parts I hate and enhanced the parts I love but most of all I knew that it was gonna stop Shawn dead in his tracks. Thank God my mom was waiting for this moment so her and Dad were prepared when I looked in horror at the price, quick stop at the Universal Bank of Amazing Parents and the dress was mine! The best part of the story is the dress fit perfect so all it needed was to be hemmed up for my shoes (I wore flats because I am a baby!). I got lucky, really, really lucky this story could have ended so much worse but didn’t. The moral here? be honest from the beginning and get started early and you won’t be having a mental breakdown on your mother 2 weeks before your wedding because your dress is hideous and the idea of wearing it in public makes you feel pukey!